Thursday, June 13, 2024
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Alone in a Room

If there’s anything positive we could look back on during the pandemic (whenever it’s actually over), it gave us time to stop, be with ourselves and our thoughts whether we wanted to or not, and just figure some of this shit out… Sorry, Mom.

As someone who has always hated stillness, silence, and all of the awkward emotions that accompany them, I’m truly thankful for it all now. Thankful for the opportunity to recognize what and why I’m feeling opposed to ignoring the truth in hopes it’ll just go away as the sun comes up, removing the darkness that fits like a shadow rather than moves like shade.

The truth? We’re tired.
A lot of us are tired, not like a usual tired that a nap can fix, but the type of tired that stays regardless of what rest you take.

Understanding that we were raised by a generation of people that were still kids in the grand scheme learning the world for themselves grows heavy. Basic human rights becoming key political talking points becomes exhausting. Prices going up while the pay doesn’t change grows to be frustrating. The world becoming more distant as the inevitable destructive creeps up in the rearview mirror feels haunting. Yet, we remain.

Day in and day out, we learn, develop, grow, and work to overcome. Daunting as it seems and as it is, we take the next step. Fairy tales make it all pretty, but man, let me tell you, it’s ugly out here.
Get up to lay down, get up to get put down, get up to fall down… sometimes things really are just down. We float through the day as we watch ourselves from inside out, wishing we could actually get out, hoping that the weight falls off and that the cloud picks on something new, but it doesn’t.

We’re the people who are supposed to have all the answers but really only have questions. The people that others look up to and place on a pedestal when the reality is we’re just as low if not under the table peeking up at where we wish to be.

People want us to pull them up and push them along, but instead, we actually need to be carried. But what are we to do? What do we do when we’re the strong friend that’s at their weakest point? How can we pour into others when our cup is empty? How do we take that next step in the middle of drowning? To be fair, problems aren’t new, but they are personal, and they fight dirty. Where there has been conflict, there has been a resolution, but to be real? Some of us don’t make it that far. It’s not fair, it’s not right, but that’s war. Right now, we’re at war with ourselves, and from either side, you look at it, we’re losing. Unlike what our masks are showing, our lives aren’t a fairy tale, the answer doesn’t always reveal itself, and the shoe doesn’t always fit on the first try.

Nobody needs another person emptily saying, “it’ll be fine, you’ll be alright,” or offering a false sentiment of thoughts and prayers when they just don’t have the capacity to truly care.

I feel as if everyone needs a “them.” Another person just like them and just like you, letting you know you’re not alone and that it’s ok not to be ok. So this is me, making sure you know somebody is there to listen and fight with you even when you don’t want to talk and are too tired to fight for yourself.

 

Article Written by: Malcolm Anderson | Malcolm Anderson is a Cum Laude graduate of Reinhardt University. From the beginning of his education, the ideas of creativity and ever-expanding curiosity were instilled in him. He loves working with children and helping them believe that they can do anything they put their mind to, a lesson he was taught from an early age. Although his focus is on Sports Media, Malcolm has been writing for various mediums over the past few years and aims to expand his repertoire in efforts to reach as many people as possible. 

 

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