Author T.L. Adams is a dynamic motivator, author, and a ball of energy whose mission is to heal the hurts and scars of broken hearts and end the cycle of destructive relationships.
In her first book, “Get Rid of Your Stupid List: Seven Reasons You are Successful and Still Single†Author T.L. Adams tackles the issues of dating when you have been hurt head-on and challenges us to look within, at our own hearts. “The book was written to encourage, motivate, and help you reflect on your decisions when it comes to dating.” Based on one woman’s personal experiences, this guide seeks to help you change the way you see relationships, men, and even yourself.Â
She is the CEO and Founder of Tyinghearts2gether, LLC, a company she founded with the belief that hearts need to be mended and tied together to establish healthy relationships.
Author T.L. Adams lives in the Dallas area with her two children. She holds a Master’s Degree in Business Administration (M.B.A.) and a Master’s Degree in Counseling. Get better acquainted with the author below.Â
Fancy: How would you describe your swagher? What makes T.L., T.L.?
Author T. L.: My swagher is firmly rooted in my desire to be of service to others. My mission is to help individuals through the journey of self-discovery. Getting to the root barriers and breaking down the walls one brick at a time, I am here to help guide you through the process of forgiveness, letting go, and killing off the dead weight.
What makes me T.L.? Time and Life. T.L. is my given initial, but time and life have been the driving forces in the makeup of the woman I was destined to be. I have so many levels. I may be short in stature, but there are depths and dimensions that transcend my natural frame. I am passionate as well as compassionate. I am educated yet still a student. I am determined yet still finding my place. I am focused yet flexible. I guess you can say I am very eclectic. You can’t just define me on what you see or heard… or even read. I am an open book, but the pages are still being written daily. I am determined to leave an inheritance for my seeds’ seed. When creating my brand, my family wasn’t only my focus but my determination EVERY decision made. My children are active contributors since the startup. During my promotion for my first novel, my children have evolved into my marketing and production staff. I am impressed with their hands-on approach and the ideas that they have contributed. Our youth are the future, and I am proud that I have an opportunity to share this experience with them. They are teenagers but they are already thinking about small business ideas that they can launch now.
Fancy: Can you tell us a little more about Tyinghearts2gether? Are your counseling services offered under this brand?
Author T.L.: Tyinghearts2gether, LLC. was founded with the belief that hearts need to be mended and tied together to establish healthy relationships. My motivation originally started from my own personal experiences. To let others know that what you were born into doesn’t have to define who you are destined to become. Despite the setback, there is still a world out there that you have every right to live and succeed in. I grew up in the era of The Cosby Show. Unfortunately for me, I didn’t have Cliff and Clair as parents. My upbringing wasn’t a sitcom but a drama-filled existence without commercial breaks. Dysfunction, disengagement, denial, and delusions were my mother and father. My father was a man that wanted to be feared in the streets as well as in his family. He was emotionally and psychologically abusive. Whoever said sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me never met my dad. His words were my constant companion when he was physically absent. My parents never married. Unfortunately, my mother thought she was doing right by her children by having male figures constantly around. She did marry, but the man of her dreams was the demon of my nightmares. My parents may have made my formative years hell, but that was only a chapter. Their choices were not going to be mine. That generational curse was going to stop with them. I knew there was more to life than what I was seeing. Remember I grew up on Cosby. He promoted education, family, and success so I was going after my different world! Under Tyinghearts2gether, LLC counseling services are offered under this brand which includes one-on-one counseling, life coaching, and relationship counseling.
Fancy: What are some examples of steps to develop and maintain lifelong bonds?
Author T. L.: Two very pivotal elements of developing and maintain lifelong bonds are simple: Forgiveness and a lot of Prayers. You can hold onto all the things that hurt you as a badge of dishonor. Trust me, it will leach onto you and never let go. You can’t shake it off. You can dress it up if you want to, but the smell of pain will always reek through. Try blocking it out, and watch it remind you that it is still there. But, when you go through the process of forgiveness, that bondage is broken. It no longer has power anymore. Do you know how hard it is to forgive your parents? It was their responsibility to protect you from all the monsters of the world. Unfortunately, when the monsters are them, there isn’t anyone to protect you. The boogeyman doesn’t have power when you stop being afraid of him. So, stop fearing forgiveness and let go. I am not talking about some book I read or a class I took in college. I am telling you from my own experience. I had to forgive my parents when they weren’t sorry. The humblest experience I ever had was asking them to forgive me as well.
Prayer seems simple but sometimes trying to find the words to say is difficult. For me, I learned that I can just go to God as is and just tell him what was on my heart. I didn’t need SAT level words. I didn’t even need to be grammatically correct. I just needed to start talking from the heart. Now I will admit, I started as a praying tattletale for all of those that hurt me. “Hey God, did you hear what my dad said or what my mom did? When are you going to strike them for that?†But with maturity and developing an intimate relationship with God, I understand the power of my words and the significance of really praying.
Fancy: What inspired your book “Get Rid of Your Stupid List: Seven Reasons You are Successful and Still Single†and can you tell us a little about it? Â
Author T. L.: My book was my therapy session. Counselors need counseling as well. I am definitely an advocate for therapy. My education helps me have a clinical understanding regarding the diagnosis of individual issues with those I encountered. However, I ignored the red flags looking directly at me. T.L. looking at T.L. without rose-colored glasses wasn’t the 20/20 vision I wanted to face, but it was needed. Everyone besides me has always been the problem. It wasn’t until I had to do an evaluation of myself that I had to come to the ugly truth of about me.
Fancy: In today’s #girlboss climate, do you think many women are passing on love for success too quickly?
Author T.L.: In my experience, women aren’t passing on love for success. But success has become their first love.
We are generations passed the idea that only men are capable of bringing home the bacon. Whether we prefer greasy pork bacon, lean turkey bacon, or vegan bacon. Women can feed themselves with or without the assistance of a man. I heard this saying that before God allowed Adam to meet Eve, he gave him a job. But what happens in this generation when “Adams” aren’t as plentiful as they once were. Or if “Adam” is laid off? That’s right, Eve had to step up and make it happen. So, the woman stopped waiting on HIM and started noticing the value she possessed. And as a girlboss, I am proud of my accomplishments and will never apologize for it. However, I will never devalue the need for a healthy partnership. We are not in competition but appreciation for what equally we bring into our commitment.
Fancy: From your counseling experience, is it ever safe to date someone whose heart hasn’t healed and how can that affect a relationship?
Author T.L.: Absolutely Never!! I am sure that isn’t grammatically correct but again- absolutely never. Listen, Jesus saves, heals and delivers. A cardiologist is a fixer of the heart. Unless you are Jesus or a cardiologist, you are not qualified to fix a broken heart. You are not equipped to play around in someone’s brokenness. Yes, I said play around because love can’t fix them, and you are playing with fire. You must let someone who is going through, get through their process. If you bypass the necessary steps and think your love has superpowers, I can guarantee the end game won’t be in your favor.
Fancy: Healthy relationships consist of…
Author T.L.: A mutual respect with each other, trust, honesty, support, and good communication. These are the key ingredients to ensure the state of your relationship foundation is solid. Also, healthy relationships are the ones that bring out the best of you instead of the worst. When you are choosing someone as a potential mate, these are the qualities that you should be looking at. These qualities are Priceless! This is the measurement stick that I encourage my readers and my clients to use when evaluating someone; not material things.
Fancy: What is the state of your own love life right now?
Author T.L.: I am in a very healthy and happy place. My life and love are equally doing well.
Fancy: So, are you going to share what T.L. stands for with us now that we’ve gotten to know you?Â
Author T.L.: The “T†stands for Tynisa and “L†stands for Lashawn.
Fancy: Do you have any upcoming events or projects that you care to share?
Author T.L.: I have a few upcoming events in the Dallas this month which include:
- The 3rd Annual Books & Burgers & More on September 7 at Eunice Activity Center Arlington
- Dallas Women Entrepreneurs (DWE) Women’s Expo September 21-22 at Sheraton Suites Market Center in Dallas
- Alpha Xi Omega Business Expo September 28th at Mountain View College in Dallas.
I will be vending signed copies of my book at these events.
Connect with Author T.L. Adams below.
- Website:Â https://authortladams.com/
- Email:Â info@authortladams.com
- Instagram: @author_t.l._adams
- Facebook:Â https://www.facebook.com/authortladams/
- Twitter: @author_adams
- YouTube:Â https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCwMrhwkorD50c45tskq1i9Q
- LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/author-t-l-adams-8a23062b?trk=public_profile_samename_mini-profile_title
