Sometimes great ideas are formed out of just living our lives. This is the story behind the event, Daddies Do Hair. A mother saw her daughter’s father struggle while attempting to do her hair. She then thought about how that very issue affects more than just their household. I caught up with the co-creators of this event a few weeks ago.
Read our interview below with Stephanie and Hawk, the organizers of the events:
1. Where was this idea conceived and what was the intention of the event?
Stephanie: The event was conceived in our home when I wanted Hawk’s (co-founder) support in combing our daughter’s hair. When he attempted but didn’t quite succeed I thought “there must be other fathers like this” I remember growing up and having my father combing my hair was heartwarming so as an event curator I thought it would be a great idea. I was in a personal development program at the time that required me to make a list of goals I wanted to accomplish in 90 days and the first Daddies DO Hair event was born, three years ago. The intention was to connect father’s with their daughters in a fun engaging way, to bring men of the community together to discuss things they deal with as fathers of color (panel discussion) and to honor their role in the daughter’s life with a token of appreciation (a crowning ceremony).
2. My father never did my hair. What bonding time would you say I and women like me missed out on?
S: For me, the time my dad took to do my hair brought us closer sometimes without even words. It was the time he took to be with me that meant the most. In our community, our hair is so much more than what it appears to signify on the surface. It is our crown. Even the history and journey of hair care in our culture have a great significance of freedom, status, and belonging. So to have my dad show vulnerability as a man of color do what is often seen as a mother’s job was a memory created that I would never forget and wanted to pass down to my daughter and other little girls. I understand that even though some girls may not have their father to do their hair, our invitation is for any male figure in their lives to step up and stand in as the king our young girls need in their lives.
3. I’ve recently noticed a new wave a Black run businesses/organizations catered to the father figure. Why do you think it took this long for the conversations to move closer to the front as far as fatherhood in the Black community is concerned?
S: I think fathers have finally become sick and tired of being painted as absent no good deadbeats. I can say I have never been in a relationship with a deadbeat father, they just aren’t in my circle. Not to say they don’t exist but unfortunately, society has made the impression that the majority of fathers of color are not around. Our men have taken a stand to show up and say that that isn’t true. Hence why more events and images of active fathers are beginning to surface. The same goes for black love and successful marriages. Empowered Stilettos saw the need as a company that specializes in empowering and uniting families of color and jumped in, in full support of our kings.
4. What is your brand doing to help reshape the narrative of Black men in general?
S: Empowered Stilettos and The Hawk Affect collectively curate unique experiences to engage, enlighten and empower not only Black men but black and brown families. We believe that it is time for us to do the work to heal the wounds of our past, erase the stories that have been placed on us and write a new narrative of who we are and what we stand for.
5. What was the initial response you got from your peers when you were planning this hair demo and panel?
Hawk: Our initial responses varied, most were in support and some were skeptical and in doubt of fathers actually showing up. Each year we’ve hosted, the men have shown up and showed out and we are even more excited to start planning next year’s event.
6. In recent days we have seen both T.I. and Alicia Keys take heat from the community regarding how they opt to raise their children. Folks were mainly against T.I.’s choice of visiting the gynecologist with his daughter while Alicia wanted to understand why her son changed his mind about not wanting rainbow-colored nails. Many commentators did not agree with her. Do you think our current culture is too invasive or too free?
S: We think our current culture is where it needs to be for the times we are in. Everything is different so we have to be different. We have to know everyone’s lifestyle, choices and parenting styles are not the same. We cannot parent exactly how our parents did nor can we parent only in reaction to. As with anything there needs to be love, respect, and balance. Once those elements are present we believe alignment will occur. Too much of anything yields error so our current culture will need to adapt, let go of judgment and create balance and understanding.
7. How does social media help you every day in your business?
H: Social media has been our main source of connection to our community. Of course authentic human connection and building relationships the old fashioned way will always be our foundation and go to but the power of social media is unmatched. We would be foolish not to use the platform as a tool to reach more families of color, influencers, businesses, and sponsors. When used for good, social media connects you with people you may not have been able to reach and allows us to transform even more lives.
To find out more about their initiatives, we encourage you to check out their social media feeds below.
About Tahyira Savanna: Tahyira is a lifestyle journalist and writer. Her interest includes human stories and introspection. She interviews everyday people doing their part to make our world a happier place.
Follow her on Twitter @TAsterisk and Instagram @iletthegoodtimesroll
