Grown A** Women & Girls are Different, and it’s Not Age!

Ladies, it’s time to raise the bar, in all areas!  Maturity doesn’t merely come from age, however it comes from learning and growing from the experiences that we’ve faced in life.  Based on personal experience and the lessons that I’ve learned, there is a different posture that a grown a** woman has that a girl does not, and it’s not just age. 

Women have such strength, and within that strength is the power to build up or tear down.  The power that we have works on ourselves, as well as others, so we must be mindful of how we treat that power.  In relationships, I have seen how some of us have torn down our relationships, because we think we are being firm, but we are being mean spirited and tearing down our relationships at our own hands.  E.g., a man that is working hard, providing for his family.  As women, we can get to a place where we need so much attention, that we will block the come-up of our significant other. 

Please see the difference, a grown a** woman:  Man working long hours as a provider, because that’s how most men show their love.  I’m not talking about those that are using work as an excuse to cheat, etc.  The response of a grown woman, she will make sure that home is comfortable, the things that he needs are readily available, and that home is a safe place.  The girl (mentality):  As soon as the significant other walks in the house, the nagging begins.  This mentality nags about the overtime that is being worked to provide, and not only the necessities of home, but the extras that you like.  During the tough days, girls add to the issues by highlighting the shortcomings of the person and beating them up after the world has already done so.

See, a grown a** woman knows how to hold the house and her man down when things get challenging. She knows how to build the spirit of her mate up and helps him to see his vision, even when his sight gets blurry.  The grown a** woman can do this because she can see past the moment and see how this benefits her growth as well.  It’s not about using someone or pacifying someone but having your own vision and seeing how everyone can win.  

This woman right here is bad a**, because she knows how to play for the win!  I love her spirit and her drive because even when things are hard, and she gets knocked down, she has allowed her spiritual muscles to be built and can stand with the best of them.  This woman glows whether she is in a relationship or not; it does not define her.  What defines this woman is her mature character and how she loves herself and those in her circle.  The compassion that she has is enough that it overflows into the lives of everyone that meets her. 

The girl (mentality) finds negative in everything, leaving her significant other feeling hopeless.  Building is not the goal; selfishness is where this mindset lives.  The only thing that she can see is how a situation can benefit her, but only in the moment; longevity is absent.  Unwillingness to sacrifice for the bigger picture never exists, because she can’t see past the immediate and see how everyone can benefit from certain sacrifices.  Thinking that you can win the war based off momentary achievements is insanity.  Destruction is always in her wake because she suffers from tunnel vision; unable to see the overall greatness of possibilities. She is tearing down relationships, because everything isn’t always about her and the instant gratification that she requires.  The safe place that her mate should find at home can never be found because she is busy throwing stones and destroying the dream; in essence, killing the vision.  We must do better!

To wrap all of this up, we can all win once we mature and develop emotionally.  All it takes to become a grown a** woman is to change our thinking; our mindset.  The only way that this can be done is to:

• Work on ourselves and worry less on the shortcomings of others, especially our sisters.
• Learn to be an encourager, a woman that empowers, not just at home but in our everyday lives.
• Start to utilize vision, not just seeing things from a momentary state and embrace greatness, even outside of your immediate circle.

Sis be great because the foundation is there, even if you have to realign, rediscover or tap into it, it is there.  Stop initiating the losses and start creating the big wins.  Grown a** women are strong, and this is what we do!

-Anika Ennett

Published Author and Founder of HERR – Healed Empowered Resiliently Restored

HERR is a platform used to empower women and help them get to a place of healing.

Follow on social media:

Facebook: Loving HERR and Author Anika Ennett

Instagram: @AuthorAnikaEnnett

Twitter: @AEnnett_HERR