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HomeLIFESTYLEThat's My Type: 5 Reasons Not to Date Your Type

That’s My Type: 5 Reasons Not to Date Your Type

Before you proclaim you don’t have a dating type, yes, you do; everyone does. We all have a dating list or profile with characteristics we find attractive in a mate. Whether you’re a person who’s obsessed with redheads, gym rats, or people with dimples, there’s a type we all gravitate to. Tell me, how has that worked out for you? Where has your ‘preference’ gotten you? If you say single, ask yourself, is what I look for in a partner really what I need? 


Suppose you can count on both hands and feet how many relationships started in the clouds only to end up in the pits of hell. In that case, you may want to revamp your relationship application because you keep hiring the wrong people repeatedly. People and things change. What you craved in a partner fifteen years ago may be the total opposite of what your maturer self needs today.


Here are five reasons why dating outside your type could be beneficial.

Reason #1: Reality Check

You may be the problem. All those failed relationships may have come across like the other person’s fault when in all actuality, it was you. Dating someone opposite us can reveal things about ourselves that we had no idea was a factor; this is just as good as bad. For example, You may discover that you parent your partners, which contradicts the ‘must be emotionally and mentally mature’ requirement you have for your ideal partner. This toxic habit may be something a ‘non-preference’ may not require you to do. This individual may not have the exact body type or social status you usually go for, but being with them will feel like being with an adult, which is something you’ve always wanted. 


Reason #2: Boost your standards

Other men and women have told you that your standards are too high and unrealistic, but this new person may make you feel like your criteria have been unbelievably low. You went from begging your partner for date night, romance, affection, or communication to not having to ask for those things. Even though they may not be as tall as you prefer, the 80/20 rule starts to make more sense the more time you spend with them.


Reason #3: Exposure to New Things

The older we get, the more we are stuck in our ways. We think we are so sure about what we like, what we don’t like, and what we’d do and wouldn’t do, but that all could change when you date a person you usually wouldn’t. Dating someone who isn’t your type could encourage you to step outside your comfort zone and discover something new about yourself. 


Reason #4: More Dating Opportunities

You have many more opportunities to find love if you are open to a various range of people. Interracial dating is vast. So many men and women have found the love of their life in a different race. Some people find love in someone who practices religions other than their own. You may be Christian, but your soulmate may be Muslim. Broadening your requirements may work in your favor.



Reason #5: You Could Have a Blast

Dating outside your comfort zone could be the most fun you’ve ever had. Everything you will learn about yourself and other cultures will be memorable. The abilities or talents activated by this experience will leave you appreciative and grateful for stepping outside the box into an unfamiliar space. Dating can be scary, and dating someone who doesn’t check all the boxes on your list can be even more frightening, but nothing is more terrifying than repeating toxic cycles in love. 


Still think you can’t date outside your type? Let us know in the comments.

Obsession | is a romance and erotica author, blogger, photographer, and artist from Chicago, IL.

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  1. I agree the older I get the more I am stuck in my ways I do like dating outside of my race and it’s different

    • Thanks for your comment Nika, and it sounds like it might make for an interesting story. We have a Transformation Tuesday section if you are ever interested in submitting it.

    • Nika,

      Thank you for reading and commenting on my article. Yes, we do get complacent in our ways, but new and different could benefit us beyond what we imagine.

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