Why Marriage Is Dating For Life

“I may not be your 1st kiss, or your 1st love, and that’s fine, because I just want to be your last.” -Unknown

You can remember the first date in explicit details like it was yesterday, and you can recall the time you first kissed, but if I ask you today when was the last time you and your spouse made out I can almost hear the gears in your brain at work as you try to focus on when was the last time. Or you turn your nose up at the idea of making out as if you are too grown to roll in the hay, so to speak, with your spouse.    

When I first began to use the quote “marriage is dating for life”, I wanted to come up with a different way of seeing my lifelong commitment to my husband in a more positive light. “Til death do you part” is a tall order, and we didn’t want to end up like other couples who are simply not interested in each other any longer. I mean I was leaving the exciting world of dating to build a life with the man I love. Should be simple right? I was spending more and more time with him and I couldn’t see my life without him in it, but I wondered what we would do to stay “into” each other as the stages of life and getting older with each other began to happen. Marriage would signal to all that we were off the market and dedicated to each other, but was I / am I interesting enough to keep his interest for life? 

While we were dating, there were numerous adventures we went on together and I enjoyed the companionship and exclusivity. Now six years into marriage with our two kids and three cats later, our adventurous ways have not ceased. We intentionally make time for each other and life’s challenges have not derailed the main focus, which is us. So many couples have lost themselves in their work, children, or just selfishness, but I could not be with someone for the rest of my life if I did not cherish and adore them. Once our children leave home I want our bond to be strong from the years we are pouring into each other and enjoy the elder years of our life as a couple.

Marriage is dating for life, because all that we would do to get a person in the beginning of a relationship requires the same intensity throughout the relationship. Our purpose to enjoy each other for the brief time we are on earth together and while God carries us, with Faith NOTHING is impossible.

Steps You Can Take To Keep the Dating Fresh In Your Marriage:

1. Change Your Environment: Too often we get caught up with our busy schedules and routine is law, that we don’t even look at our spouses and take in how blessed we are to have them in our life, especially if you have children. Changing the environment forces you to think outside of the obstacles of life and brings the focus to each other
2. Make Dating A Priority and Schedule Alone Time: For my marriage, our children spend time with their aunt and grandma once a month for the entire weekend. We have come to call this time our “Baby Free Weekend”. We don’t always do extravagant activities and most of the time cherish that we get to sleep in, but this time is a priority exclusively to us. There are no outside events scheduled that would take us from each other, and we don’t leave the house without each other. This time is for us to reconnect, and just like love struck teenagers want to be around each other all the time, we make the same effort to feel the same way about each other.
3. Don’t Be Afraid To Stay In Extra Mode For Each Other: Ladies, when was the last time you beat your face or slipped into something sexy for your spouse? Fellas, do you conspicuously make efforts to stay fresh and nice for your spouse? Wear her favorite cologne or shave and dress to only impress her? Humans are relational beings, and we are drawn to what we are attracted to. In order to keep the flame lit, we have to be willing to be intentional about our appearance for our spouse. Some may say this is superficial, but when you are “Dating for Life”, you have to consider that you were not initially attracted to your spouse’s intellectual capacity. You thought he/she looked great and wanted to get to know them more. Now that you to know more about each other, this is a great opportunity to showcase your finest moves and get dolled up for each other.
4. Make Kissing A Top Priority: This should be self-explanatory but studies have shown that the lips are the most sensitive parts on the body, and with stimulation from your spouse your central nervous system is alive and alert. I’m not just talking about a quick smooch but a deep lip lock that leaves you both breathless when you finally come up for air. I’m talking about a REAL Hollywood moment between lovers refined by the sands of time.
5. Watch How You Speak To Your Spouse: My husband has adopted the mantra “Baby, I am not your enemy.” With this knowledge, I must adopt a “handle with care” personality because all too often we will take liberties to speak badly to our spouse, while we go out of our way to be kind to a stranger. We cannot treat other people or even or children better that we treat our spouse.

Have fun with your Love and never stop growing!

“Two are better than one because they have a good reward for their labor.” Ecc 4:9

-La’toyia Warren 

 

About Me: Family is Everything!!!! I am Wife and Mom to 2 beautiful girls under 10. I strongly believe that we never stop becoming and so I have entered the world of Mompreneur to chase my dreams to become a motivational speaker and writer. BeautiFly & Free was birthed for families and couples to have a safe haven from a world that does not value marriage and family very highly with positive visuals of family and married life not discussed in main stream media. While I am also shooting for the moon, I am also Chief Of Staff with Thick N Sassy Plus Size Fashion & Models. This company is focused on the plus-size community based on self-worth, self-love, and self-respect no matter what size a person may be. I model and recently have started to train women and young girls on the art of Runway Modeling. Today I am Amazing, and tomorrow is yet to be said, but I approach with expectancy and hope.